Episode 12
Stop your dog from fixating on your cat - Coaching Call
This week, Naomi gives you a peek behind the curtain at the Cat and Dog Coexistence Club for a private office hours session with one of its members as they discuss Bridget's dog Bella who is hyper-fixated on her cat Walter.
Key Moments
[01:01] Different types of attention
[02:18] Predatory sequence in dogs
[04:28] Ways to train in the orient stage
[05:14] Two ways to "unstick" a dog
[06:46] Finding the sweet spot to do training
[07:56] Miscalibrations are understandable
[09:20] Practicing while Eyeing bakes tension into the behavior
[09:46] Working on a true relax in place behavior
[11:23] Why routine in management is so good
[12:45] Training the cat as well for enrichment
[13:41] Training cats makes them more relaxed
[14:00] Progress
[15:08] Relax on the Mat protocol
[16:46] Body language is a great starting point
Key Links
Transcript
Welcome to It's Training Cats and Dogs - the show for people with both
Naomi:cats and dogs who want peace in their home and peace between their animals.
Naomi:I'm Naomi Rotenberg and today's episode is a peek into a private
Naomi:office hours session that I recently had with one of the wonderful members
Naomi:of my Cat and Dog Coexistence Club.
Naomi:This call took place on Zoom so I really apologize for the fuzzy
Naomi:sound, but the info we talked about was so good that I knew you
Naomi:all would be able to look past it.
Naomi:Bridget has a cat named Walter and a young German shepherd, Bella who
Naomi:fixates on Walter and isn't able to calm down when she knows that he's around.
Naomi:During this call, we talked about common mistakes that people make when
Naomi:trying to train their animals to look away from stuff and some techniques to
Naomi:work on helping Bella disengaged from triggers, both in and out of the house.
Naomi:Let's get into it.
Naomi:Talk to me about what's going on in your head between the different types
Naomi:of attention that you're thinking.
Bridget:Oh, Bella likes to observe everything.
Bridget:So we will spend time like at the park, always 10 to 15 minutes of
Bridget:just sitting and watching the world.
Bridget:Sometimes I don't know if some of her engagement is good or if it's a
Bridget:little too focused, but since her body language isn't lunging, isn't going
Bridget:towards it, I just let it happen.
Bridget:And I treat her when she looks at me.
Bridget:So I'm working on or work on with her.
Bridget:Um, when I sit with her and I will give, I just give Walter treats.
Bridget:I don't really train him to do anything right now because I'm
Bridget:just trying to get him to be okay.
Bridget:Being around this monster with her because she's so hyper on him.
Bridget:I'll try to see, can I get her to shake my hand?
Bridget:Can I get her to touch and look in a different direction?
Bridget:Can I get her to look over here, but that's a lot of meat.
Bridget:So I watched one day, what happens if I don't show her to do anything?
Bridget:Does she ever not stare directly into the cat's face?
Bridget:And it's not very frequently, even with she's being outside and making
Bridget:all this noise and coming out of the house, she is high-profile.
Bridget:So trying to get her to disengage with the cat without telling her, I feel like
Bridget:it's more powerful than me telling her.
Naomi:So this is a very common issue where I think the key is thinking about
Naomi:the predatory sequence in dogs and where she is in the first three sections of it.
Naomi:So.
Naomi:The first thing is orient.
Naomi:So she looks towards Walter, right.
Naomi:Or whatever he's looking at, the next step is eyeing.
Naomi:So that's where you get that kind of intense looking.
Naomi:So we can go from eyeing to the early stages of stalking.
Naomi:That's the next part.
Naomi:So that's where you see forward momentum, even if she's not leaning
Naomi:or like lunging forward, it's that really tense forward body posture.
Naomi:So ideally when we are trying to change her behavior or emotions around
Naomi:whatever she's looking at, we are only working at the orient stage.
Naomi:So if you're at the eyeing or the early stages of the
Naomi:stalking, she is over threshold.
Naomi:Now we have the unique issue when we're working in our home.
Naomi:That we don't have unlimited distance to be able to say, great, you're
Naomi:over threshold at the farthest ends of the house, for example.
Naomi:We can't go any further.
Naomi:So sometimes we have to be pretty creative in how we approach our setups,
Naomi:but what I would recommend before we even try to do let's look at Walter.
Naomi:And then look away is really get her not to be as starey at other things.
Naomi:So if we can get her a little bit more muscle memory of staying in
Naomi:that orient phase with less kind of emotionally charged triggers, then
Naomi:you're going to be much more likely to get a dog who's still able to think
Naomi:when doing setups later on with Walter.
Naomi:And there's a couple of ways to work on this.
Naomi:One is when you're outside and you want to be doing your let's
Naomi:look at stuff in the world.
Naomi:I want to make sure that she is not stuck in those stages and practicing
Naomi:being stuck in those stages.
Naomi:So the first thing we need to teach her is how to respond to cues
Naomi:where you're actively managing her.
Naomi:We need to install a series of behaviors where you can very easily move her
Naomi:when she looks like she's stuck.
Naomi:There are some really easy ones that should be practiced in
Naomi:the house or right outside of.
Naomi:Number one is treat scatter on the ground.
Naomi:Can you look away from the thing and snuffle stuff off to the side of you?
Naomi:The other one is like a U-turn with magnet of food in front of her if she needs that.
Naomi:We want to control where she's looking is the main goal of this.
Naomi:And those are two really foundational ones of being able to, if she's stuck
Naomi:and you'll be able to know if she's.
Naomi:If you can count a quick 1, 2, 3, and she's got nothing and you can test it.
Naomi:You could say any kind of attention, noise.
Naomi:I wouldn't use her name, just seeing if she'll, if she'll give
Naomi:you an ear flick or anything.
Naomi:She's still stuck.
Naomi:We still want to get distance or move her behind a visual barrier or something.
Naomi:But at least we know she's not in full.
Naomi:Like I stopped.
Naomi:She's still able to look back.
Naomi:And so you want to find, not just like staring at the world in general.
Naomi:Cause she's probably just overwhelmed by all of the stuff
Naomi:that she's able to look at.
Naomi:But what I would suggest is saying, okay, once a day, Try to find something
Naomi:relatively easy that she can look at.
Naomi:So if she's obsessed with watching dogs, for example, playing, we're not
Naomi:going to go to a field where there's 20 dogs, but we might go on a park
Naomi:bench where it's a little bit quieter, where there might be dogs just walking
Naomi:by, on leash across the street.
Naomi:So we're really trying to find that sweet spot where if she is able to stay in that
Naomi:orient zone with minimal intervention.
Naomi:Great.
Naomi:Hang out there and do like a, a therapy session of look at that and look away.
Naomi:Oh, this is so nice.
Naomi:It's really fun.
Naomi:We're not fighting each other.
Naomi:If you find that she switches over into eyeing or stalking,
Naomi:that's when you would say therapy session is not happening right now.
Naomi:I need to get you out of here because you're just practicing, getting stuck.
Naomi:Does that all make sense?
Naomi:That's for outside that's if you magically find a spot one day, once a day, a
Naomi:couple of minutes, and then you're done.
Naomi:Do you want to be practicing on your wall?
Naomi:These active strategies when there's nothing happening, you want to just be
Naomi:like, oh look, we're having a nice time.
Naomi:Can you eat a scatter?
Naomi:Cause I know you were saying sometimes she won't eat outside at all.
Naomi:Is that right?
Bridget:Like yesterday I took her to a new place.
Bridget:Cause I was just like, let's go someplace new.
Bridget:You took her to a park by Aaron's house.
Bridget:Squirels.
Bridget:Everywhere.
Bridget:And it was like, yeah, we can't can't be here at that point.
Bridget:It was like nothing I said, or did she wouldn't even take a tree, wouldn't even
Bridget:take her high-value chickens, nothing.
Bridget:So I was like, you gotta go.
Naomi:Exactly.
Naomi:And that's, there's nothing wrong with that.
Naomi:In fact, you're helping yourself and you're helping
Naomi:her by saying I miscalibrated.
Naomi:I thought this might be an enjoyable experience.
Naomi:You're showing me that it's too much for you.
Naomi:Okay.
Naomi:We'll work up to it.
Naomi:And we'll try again.
Naomi:Once we've worked on stuff in.
Naomi:Oh, my God, this is new and they're squirrels and there's
Naomi:lots of new smells and where am I?
Naomi:And all of that stuff.
Bridget:Yeah, we do go to a park daily.
Bridget:She is very well behaved.
Bridget:It's a huge park.
Bridget:There's lots of people, soccer games, and, but we go there so regularly.
Bridget:She's doing really well there.
Bridget:So I practice a lot there when you see other animals.
Bridget:And I made sure that we're our distances enough where I can
Bridget:scanner or try to distract her.
Naomi:Great.
Naomi:So I would say you're probably still working often in that eyeing,
Naomi:even at that part, rather than the orient, because most people aren't
Naomi:able to see the switch fast enough.
Naomi:So now that you know what you're looking for, I want you to focus on that for
Naomi:the next couple of days to say, am I trying to fight her a little bit?
Naomi:Or is she just hold up, mom, look, I saw a thing.
Naomi:And so if she is able to not just behave and do the things that you
Naomi:want her to do, but to actually look relaxed, that's exactly what we want.
Bridget:I definitely thinks I can start to see that switch over
Bridget:but before I started talking to you it wouldn't have clicked yet.
Naomi:That's what I'm here for.
Naomi:Yeah.
Naomi:When a dog is, or any animal is in that eye, you build that
Naomi:tension into the behavior.
Naomi:So even if they are able to reorient to you, it's not a relaxed situation.
Naomi:And so when you try to use that type of setup with Walter, for example,
Naomi:there's going to be that tension.
Naomi:And we want from the beginning it's to be as relaxed as possible.
Naomi:So one other behavior that we're going to start working with her and
Naomi:him, but her, especially because she has no chill is not just, she has a
Naomi:place behavior, but I want to work on a true, relax on a mat behavior.
Naomi:Like can she melt.
Naomi:Okay.
Naomi:I'm here for the duration.
Naomi:It's just how I roll and she's not sleeping, but working towards
Naomi:that and there's a special protocol for that, that will do.
Naomi:But the goal here is that if she can do the real relaxation in
Naomi:different areas, you could then take that mat out to different places.
Naomi:And say, oh, look, this is your relaxed mat.
Naomi:You might be able to actually relax because we've practiced this so much.
Naomi:With her, our last consideration with the relaxing and any of these things is
Naomi:that if Walter is potentially around, she is not under threshold in your house.
Naomi:So we need to find a place where she can actually relax.
Bridget:Walter is now pretty much in the basement all the time.
Bridget:She now knows this.
Bridget:So she stopped going to the door as much because there's no cat door.
Bridget:So she knows like whatever.
Bridget:I built it into the routine and it's certain times in the day.
Bridget:And they're always pretty much the same time.
Bridget:I'm going down the basement stairs with Walter and she has got to find her.
Bridget:She doesn't try to rush.
Bridget:She just sits and waits more relaxed knowing he's there,
Bridget:but he's someplace else.
Bridget:My room is probably her most relaxed.
Naomi:Great.
Naomi:So we will stay there.
Naomi:We'll start there.
Naomi:And what you just described is the most wonderful reason that routine
Naomi:and management for dogs who are truly anxious about the other thing need that.
Naomi:Because they can expect a situation to unfold in a certain way, and they
Naomi:don't have to feel this unknown.
Naomi:They feel a little bit more control over their environment.
Naomi:And that is really great.
Naomi:Like I said, for the animals that are a little scared of the thing,
Naomi:whether it's the cat or anything else, and they just want it to go away.
Naomi:And that's why they're behaving in these kind of crazy nutty.
Naomi:Having this kind of out of sight, out of mind, types of management really
Naomi:tends to help them decompress and relax.
Naomi:And so it's a really good way to see, okay, what can we do to make
Naomi:sure that she is as decompressed and relaxed as possible?
Naomi:So we can start building in and building up these new behaviors in a relaxed way.
Naomi:So I'm really happy that she's already getting with the program.
Naomi:You found that the new management is working for you.
Naomi:As long as Walter is happy, then we are good to go to start training some
Naomi:of these foundation behaviors for her.
Naomi:For him, one of the things you could do for enrichment is to also start
Naomi:training him while you're down there.
Naomi:So you could start teaching him to go sit on a mat.
Bridget:Well, I bought a treat dispenser that turned out to be wonderful because
Bridget:now he is trying to get the treats so when I'm not there he has something to do.
Bridget:But I've been trying to get him to fetch or I throw the treats
Bridget:cause he also won't run around.
Bridget:When I play with him, he wants to stay by me.
Bridget:You gotta get.
Bridget:Run in you.
Bridget:And I do put a little wash glove and give him another treat if he touches it.
Bridget:And he's definitely a cat that I thought would listen like that, but, but if I knew
Bridget:how to train him I think he could get it.
Bridget:Was the cat, whoever thought you could train...
Bridget:I don't know why people don't think that, but nobody does that.
Bridget:So you don't think that cats are really trainable, but I'm
Bridget:noticing that he's actually pretty trainable, even with small things.
Bridget:How to get the treat dispenser out.
Bridget:He learned in like 30 seconds.
Naomi:Yeah.
Naomi:And so what you're going to start to see is that training him as well is going
Naomi:to give him more agency and feeling like he's in control and more relaxed.
Naomi:And so when you do bring them together, it's not just him being the trigger.
Naomi:He's also a part of the training and it works really well.
Naomi:Cool.
Naomi:How are you feeling?
Bridget:Good.
Bridget:Definitely good.
Bridget:The management has been a game-changer for us, like in these two fell off.
Bridget:I do feel bad often about Walter, but then I go downstairs and like
Bridget:this basement is bigger than my whole apartment that we lived in.
Bridget:Like he's okay.
Bridget:He's got lots of windows, got lots of places to climb.
Bridget:He's got lots of toys.
Bridget:I just feel bad that he doesn't get to like sleep with me and stuff.
Bridget:But I think he's adjusting.
Bridget:He does copy me out.
Bridget:Bella has stopped reacting to his Meow unless I react to it.
Bridget:If I don't react to, if she's cool and she just sleeps and leaves.
Bridget:We don't have an issue, but he hasn't come up to meow, I
Bridget:think it was five days in a row.
Bridget:Yeah, his work's great.
Bridget:This, I feel really good about.
Bridget:'cause I feel like it's stuff I'm starting to, just through watching
Bridget:videos and paying attention things.
Bridget:I'm starting to realize that's what needs to be worked on next
Bridget:again, that eyeing and stalking.
Bridget:I didn't know really where I was with that.
Bridget:So that's super helpful.
Bridget:And relax on the mat is also the next thing I've been researching
Bridget:and watching videos on is how the hell do people do this?
Bridget:Because I can't get her to do that.
Naomi:So I have a protocol that is based on.
Naomi:There's a famous vet behaviorist.
Naomi:Karen Overall, who developed this relaxation protocol.
Naomi:That's the way that I would recommend working on this.
Naomi:And it's actually like a step-by-step it's like day one, have her go to her
Naomi:mat and then count for five seconds.
Naomi:So you don't have to worry.
Bridget:We all know that videos are like work on the three Ds and I'm
Bridget:like, what, how long and how much distance and what does that mean?
Bridget:What if it doesn't work?
Bridget:What do I do then?
Naomi:You have just outlined the module that I'm working on in the
Naomi:training course that I working on it.
Naomi:So, yeah.
Naomi:I'm glad that you hit on all the things that everyone has these same questions.
Naomi:Because it takes us as trainers, years to figure out how to tweak things based
Naomi:on subtle body language indicators.
Naomi:How are you supposed to know when this is all new to you?
Bridget:Right.
Bridget:It's been an amazing journey.
Bridget:We've had dogs that we have never really trained our dogs before.
Bridget:I may have like tricks and all that stuff, but I just, even the other way,
Bridget:my boyfriend's says her tail is wagging, but that doesn't mean she's happy.
Bridget:And he was like come on and I was like, no, for real, it's like I now know all
Bridget:of these things that I looking at paying attention to how many times she licks
Bridget:her lips, how many times she yawns.
Bridget:Never in my life did I realize how intricate all this was?
Bridget:So it was pretty amazing.
Bridget:Couple of months just learning things that I didn't even know.
Naomi:Yeah, body language is probably the best way to start because you
Naomi:realize that are so much subtlety, but you can triage first working on some of
Naomi:the management techniques in the house.
Naomi:You can switch back and forth between the relaxation for one session and
Naomi:the other management techniques.
Naomi:Okay.
Naomi:Yay.
Naomi:We will hit the ground running.
Bridget:Alright, awesome.
Bridget:Thank you!
Naomi:I hope you enjoyed this peek behind the curtain of the
Naomi:Cat and Dog Coexistence Club.
Naomi:If you're having trouble with the cat/dog interactions in your home, and you feel
Naomi:like this is the kind of support that you've been looking for, in addition
Naomi:to being a member of an awesomely supportive community, group coaching
Naomi:and training resources, as a member, you also get one private office hour
Naomi:slot with me per month of membership.
Naomi:You can find out more information at praiseworthypets.com/club.
Naomi:That's all for now you wonderful cat and dog people.
Naomi:See you back here next week.
Naomi:For another episode of It's Training Cats and Dogs.